Burt's Bees Baby - Daily Cream to Powder

This is a diaper cream that is meant to have a powdery finish.
And it does dry down to a powder, which is cool.

It has a soapy scent which is quite strong, so if you don't like they way it smells, you are in for a bad time. I personally like the scent though.
The product also boasts to be 99% natural, which includes a natural fragrance.
It also has no phthalates, parabens, mineral oil or SLS.

I really wanted to like this product, but it separates almost immediately.
You go to squeeze some out of the tube and just the oil part comes out.
If you have a baby, this product is just annoying and is going straight in the bin!

It's a nice idea, but it needs to be reformulated.

Price: 1/5 ($12.24 for 113g)
Scent: 5/5
Effectiveness: 0/5

Dr. Junghans - Medical Cherry Stone Pillow

This is a heat pack that contains cherry stones.
I've used (and made) barley heat packs before, but cherry stones are new to me.

On the first few uses, it does have a smell (earthy) but this fades over time.

Our microwave is dead and while you can heat it in the oven, it is a pain in the butt to do so.
It takes a long time to heat up and when heated, doesn't stay hot for long.

Honestly I don't think cherry stones work so well for retaining heat.
when you have bad cramps, you don't want to be getting up to re-heat your heat pack every 15 minutes.

Price: 4/5 ($12.63 for a 20cm x 30cm pack)
Scent: 2/5
Effectiveness: 1.5/5

Head & Shoulders - Instant Oil Control - Shampoo

I purchased this because it had limes on the front and it does not smell like limes, so I am sad.

But I did also needed an anti-dandruff shampoo, so I guess it was ok.

I cannot report on much in the way of 'oil control'. 
My hair is just as oily as it was prior.
I don't think it is an 'oil control' shampoo.

Just as an anti-dandruff shampoo, it works well.
Lathers well, cleans well, and less dandruff.

The scent is like a  *****.
If you sniff it a lot and use your imagination, you might be able to convince yourself there is a citrus note.

Price: 2/5 ($5.88 for 260mL)
Scent: 0/5 (Why must you deceive me?!)
Effectiveness: 2/5

Neureg spag.Peka Drops

May I present to you more homeopathic bulls**t!

This is an alcohol based tincture and I don't appreciate the alcohol.

This product is supposedly for:
"The fast pace of modern life places large demands on many individuals' mental and physical performance. As a result, it is necessary to help the body overcome mental strain and emotional exhaustion. NEU-regen syrup helps restore proper organ function and energetically balance the performance of the body through gentle regulation. In contrast, drugs such as stimulants and sedatives place even greater demands upon an exhausted body."
Which is all a bunch of baloney.

In addition to mostly alcohol, this bottle of booze was shown google image search pictures of Argentum nitricum, Cinchona officinalis, Conium, Nux vomica, Staphysagria, Avena sativa, Ginseng, Piper methysticum, Argentum nitricum, Cinchona officinalis, Conium, and some sugar.

Of course I do not recommend this product at all.
It won't do anything apart put some stuff in your body that your body just has to get rid off.

Price: 0/5 ($31.12 for 150mL of s**t gin)
Effectiveness: -5/5

NYX - Colour Mascara - Purple

A fun twist on normal mascara, this is meant to make your lashes purple.

However the colour doesn't really show. 
Bummer.

Price: 4/5 ($12.95 for 9mL)
Scent: 1/5 (kinda stinky)
Effectiveness: 1/5

Colgate - Optic White - (Toothbrush +) Built-In Whitening Pen

I got this on sale! :D
For this review the focus will be on the pen, not the brush.

This pen contains a 4.5% hydrogen peroxide paste.
Instructions say apply two clicks to the top teeth and bottom teeth, twice a day for three days.

Before treatment.

After three days.

I don't see much difference.
Price: ($19.99 for toothbrush and pen)
Scent: 1/5 (mild hydrogen peroxide smell)
Effectiveness: 0/5

Anatomicals - zap! zap! zap! gets that chap - Spot Stick

My skin doesn't understand that I'm not a teenager anymore.
I still get pimples... occasionally they are impressively bad!

So I thought I'd give this spot treatment a try.
It has a night and day treatment.

The day treatment is clear and smells kind of citrus-y.
The night treatment is white and smells like tea tree oil.

I used it on a few pimples I had over the past few months and... I don't think it really did anything.

Toothpaste is still the best thing I have for pimples.

Price: 3/5 ($7.03 for 7mL total)
Scent: 3/5
Effectiveness: 1/5

Garnier - Dark Spot Corrector

I got this to help fade some spots on my arms and I really regret buying it.
The tube next to me is 95% full.

The formulation is useless, I saw no change in pigmentation and it doesn't soak in at all... It just pills off and makes a big mess.

What were they thinking?

Price: 3/5 ($7-17 for 50mL on ebay)
Scent: 1/5
Effectiveness: 0/5

Garnier - Fructis Fortifying Shampoo - Full & Luscious

This was a free sample I got from the train station (Success!).

It says it contains pomegranate but smells like FAKE APPLES! Why?! Why you do these things?!

It was a 10mL sample, but even with my now short hair, that wasn't enough to get a good lather :(

Did I feel it left my hair strands filled with fibra-cylane? Nope
It felt like a cheap marketing trick without enough dedication to even use real smoke and mirrors

Give 'em the ol' Razzle Dazzle!

As a basic shampoo, there is cheaper things that work better. So not worth it.

Price: 2/5 (rrp $5.95 for 250mL)
Scent: 0/5 
Effectiveness: 1/5

Maybelline - Master Precise Liquid liner

I wanted to like this... but for some damn reason, product hardly came out when I used it near my eyes.
I can draw lines on my hands too my heart's content, but the minute I try to use it as intended, it failed :(

Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?
Perhaps it has to do with natural oils made by my eyelids.

"I need an eye liner that works" Solution:

Currently loving the 'Eye of Horus' eye liner!

Price: 3/5 (rrp $14.95 for one pen of disappointment)
Scent: 2/5 (not much of anything)
Effectiveness: 0/5

Protane Naturals - Moroccan Argan Oil Hydrating Shampoo

I wanted to love this (the clear rip of Organix shampoo that it is)... but I couldn't.
It didn't lather well, you have to wash twice to get a clean feel and the bottle... THE BOTTLE!...

Perhaps I am the weakest person ever...

Ok, definitely weak, but I couldn't squeeze the damn shampoo out! So frustrating!

Oh Aldi, how you let me down!

"I want working shampoo" Solution:

Effective, cheap and cheerful!

Price: 4/5 ($5.00 for 400mL)
Scent: 2/5
Effectiveness: 0/5

Nip + Fab - Bust Fix - Décolleté Gel

I picked this up at Target while buying some viper venom cream from the same line... even though I am a proud member of the itty bitty titty committee, I thought "hey, why not?"

This cream is meant to work by firming up the skin of the breast, thereby making them perkier (I don't need help in this department, don't even need a bra!) and perhaps make them bigger (this is where I come in).

While using this, I noticed no change in my bust appearance beyond what any moisturiser would do for my skin... but did they feel different, and not in a good way!

My boobs ached so bad! They felt in constant need of massage like a cramped muscle (Pro tip: very difficult to convince people to squeeze my boobs)... this discomfort rendered the whole experience a bad one.

'I want bigger boobs' Solution:

Probably not what you wanted to hear, but breast implants are pretty much the only way to increase bust size. If you think this may be for you, do your research! Remember, they are not for life (need to be replaced every ten years) and the surgery comes with risks (like every surgery).

Personally, I'll keep my itty bitty titties just the way they are :)

Price: 1/5 (rrp $35.95 for 100mL)

Scent: 1/5

Effectiveness: 0/5